Women, Our Dressing Should Be Modest
Many women are committing adultery and fornication every day with men they do not know because of their dressing styles. Our manner of dressing as women matters and has grave consequences both on earth and eternally.
Our dressing can lead both ourselves and others to hell.
The way we dress can lead both ourselves and others to hell because dressing is closely related to sexual sins and lust. We need to be very careful as born-again women when it comes to our dressing and be led by the Holy Spirit in all things. The apostles Paul and Peter addressed this matter specifically and instructed godly women to dress modestly. They emphasized that women should adorn themselves with respectable clothes, modesty, self-control, good deeds, and the inner beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit.
“Likewise, I want the women to adorn themselves with respectable apparel, with modesty, and with self-control, not with braided hair or gold or pearls or expensive clothes, but with good deeds, as is proper for women who profess to worship God.” 1 Timothy 2:9
“Your beauty should not come from outward adornment, such as braided hair or gold jewelry or fine clothes, but from the inner disposition of your heart, the unfading beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is precious in God’s sight. For this is how the holy women of the past adorned themselves.” 1 Peter 3:3-5
A demonstration of dressing from the Holy Spirit.
One day in 2023, after the Holy Spirit had been teaching me about modest dressing and, by God’s grace, helped me radically change the way I dressed, I was walking in the streets of Nairobi, and the Holy Spirit made me acutely aware of how poorly women dressed. It’s like my eyes were open for the first time.
I walked behind this lady with very tight sweatpants and a very small-fitting spaghetti top, with her breasts, back, and arms all exposed. She was very curvy, and everything was exposed. She was also very heavily made up with fake hair and nails and tattoos all over. I heard within me, “Watch.” I observed the men walking behind her, those approaching her, and those sitting on the street watching her pass, and most of them had their eyes fixed on her buttocks, breasts, or hips. And I heard the Holy Spirit tell me so clearly, “By the time this woman goes home today, she will have committed fornication/adultery with countless men.”
It grieved me. This is what happens every day to many women, and this is how I was, too, without even realizing it. I would get a lot of attention when I walked because of how I dressed and exposed my body parts and shape. I used to think men were the problem. (Yet now I no longer get such type of attention, proving men were not the problem; my dressing was.)
Revealing dressing can arouse lust.
A woman will argue that she didn’t commit adultery with all those men or do anything to them. But that is just ignorance, selfishness, and self-deception. Jesus said whoever looks at a woman to lust after her has committed adultery with her in his heart.
A woman’s manner of dressing contributes to how a man looks at her. Men are naturally created to be attracted to women’s bodies through their eyes. And especially private areas—breasts, thighs, waist, and hips—it’s proven by evolutionary biology and psychology. Therefore, what we wear as women contributes to whether a man lusts or not.
“But I say unto you, that whosoever looketh on a woman to lust after her hath committed adultery with her already in his heart.” Matthew 5:28:
Paul says this: “Be careful, however, that your freedom does not become a stumbling block to the weak… By sinning against your brothers in this way and wounding their weak conscience, you sin against Christ. Therefore, if what I eat causes my brother to stumble, I will never eat meat again so that I will not cause him to stumble.” 1 Corinthians 8:9, 12, 13
Jesus warned against being stumbling blocks and causes of sin.
Jesus warned against being a stumbling block to others. Every time a woman causes men to lust because of her manner of dressing or lack of it, she is equally guilty in God’s eyes of the sexual lust that has gripped the boys or men who have looked upon her with lust. She has become a cause of sin, a source of temptation. We can argue about it till we are blue in the face, but that’s how God sees it.
“Woe to the world for the causes of sin. These stumbling blocks must come, but woe to the man through whom they come!” Matthew 18:7
We are meant to be our brother’s keepers. Christians no longer live for themselves. We have a responsibility for how we live, what we do, and how it affects others. We do not just live to please ourselves. Just because we can do something does not mean we should. For love’s sake, many times we must deny ourselves and truly love in deed and not words only.
“For you, brothers, were called to freedom; but do not use your freedom as an opportunity for the flesh. Rather, serve one another in love.” Galatians 5:13
“It is better not to eat meat or drink wine or to do anything to cause your brother to stumble.” Romans 14:21
“Each of you should be concerned not only about your own interests, but about the interests of others as well.” Philippians 2:4
“We who are strong ought to bear with the shortcomings of the weak and not to please ourselves. Each of us should please his neighbor for his good, to build him up.” Romans 15:1-2
“For none of us lives to himself alone.” Romans 14:7
Our bodies are the temples of the Holy Spirit. Our dressing should please him.
Many women say that their way of dressing should not concern anyone, and they can dress how they want because their bodies belong to them. But that is not what the Bible says. We have been bought at the high price of the blood of Jesus. Our bodies are not ours but the temple of the Holy Spirit, and so we can’t just decide to wear what we please.
The Holy Spirit has to guide us even in our dressing. And he will always guide us towards modesty and shamefacedness. He will guide us towards not drawing attention sexually to our bodies or causing others to stumble because he is a spirit of holiness, decency, and love.
“Do you not know that your body is a temple of the Holy Spirit who is in you, whom you have received from God? You are not your own; you were bought at a price. Therefore, glorify God with your body.” 1 Corinthians 6:19-20
Modesty vs. idolatry.
When a woman parades her body and beauty to such degrees that it captivates men’s attention lustfully, it is a form of IDOLATRY, vanity, and pride. This is because it takes the men’s minds off God and onto her to worship and be in awe of her beauty. Worship is simply devotion and adoration. As women, despite feigned ignorance, we know the power our bodies and beauty have over men, and that’s why we draw attention to them. It is idolatry before God.
The apostles Paul and Peter, both founding fathers of our faith, instructed us women to dress in modesty, SOBRIETY (self-control), and shamefacedness (Greek aidós: modesty, reverence, shame, and respect). This was purposefully included in the scriptures and was important enough for them to mention in the letters to the churches.
The born-again woman should draw attention away from her body and beauty to Christ. She should adorn herself instead with a quiet and meek spirit, which in the sight of God is precious. We are to do everything for the glory of Christ, not our own, including dressing. We can look nice, but in moderation. Moderation is the spirit behind modesty.
“In like manner also, that women adorn themselves in modest apparel, with shamefacedness and sobriety; not with braided hair, or gold, or pearls, or costly array.” 1 Timothy 2:9
“Whose adorning let it not be that outward adorning of plaiting the hair, and of wearing of gold, or of putting on of apparel; but let it be the hidden man of the heart, in that which is not corruptible, even the ornament of a meek and quiet spirit, which is in the sight of God of great price. For after this manner in the old time the holy women also, who trusted in God, adorned themselves.” 1 Peter 3:3-5
“Let your moderation be known unto all men.” Philippians 4:5
Loving God by loving the brethren.
We should be careful that our freedom does not lead us to sin against God and others. If we cause others to stumble into sin because of something we could have avoided, all because of selfishness and pride, we will not escape God’s judgment. Let us determine not to help Satan in his mission to destroy souls. The law of Christ is LOVE. Let us do all for the glory of God, even dressing.
“Abstain from every form of evil.” 1 Thessalonians 5:22
“Love does no wrong to its neighbor. Therefore, love is the fulfillment of the law.” Romans 13:10
“And whatever you do, whether in word or deed, do it all in the name of the Lord Jesus, giving thanks to God the Father through him.” Colossians 3:17
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